The word tantra has the capacity to really get some people’s backs up.
Like dropping it into a general conversation about spirituality and suddenly we’re on unchartered territory, both because we’re not really sure what it is, yet it feels like it should be something we should know about, and that we should be open minded about, in fact as a progressive woke individual we should be really into it! But as we don’t actually know what the heck it is, it’s a little uncertain.
All I know about Tantra
I am absolutely no expert on this subject, it just really bothered me that every man and his dog seemed to be talking about this tantra thing, but no one seemed to be able to tell me what exactly it is. Which is great if the intention is to make it seem all the more mysterious…
All I know about tantra is really just based on a vigorous falling down the informational highway of the interwebs until I went round in circles concluding this to be the limit of the knowledge out there. Because really, if the knowledge ain’t on the internet, it ain’t exist – amma right?!
So what is Tantra?
Firstly, the reason there might be confusion around tantra is because there actually is no one specific definition of what it is. So when people say “I do Tantra” or “I’m into Tantra” and your brain starts firing off synaptic connections ranging from “this could mean Dieter’s Wife-Swapping Club for Over 60s” all the way to “esoteric mysticism potentially explaining the meaning of the universe”, don’t judge too harshly, because it could literally (yes, literally “literally”) mean anything in between.
Loosely defined, Tantra is a kind of recognised set of related or interconnected practices. The word “tantra” in Indian traditions just means a kind of systematic practice or technique…so I guess you could say it means “a bunch of stuff”. In Sanskrit “tantra” literally means “loom, warp, weave.”
In modern interpretation, I guess that would include the inference/assumption that these are based on some eastern traditions, or beliefs from the past.
No one belief system
Tantra is not attached to one spiritual belief system – it has roots in Hinduism and Buddhism. “Tantric Hindu” and the Vajrayana tradition of Buddhism have also influenced other Eastern religious traditions such as Jainism, Tibetan Bön tradition, Daoism and the Japanese Shintō tradition. So “Tantra” is not one set of beliefs, but has had a wide influence over many belief systems.
A colonial era European invention…
The connotation of the word “tantra” to mean an esoteric [intended for or likely to be understood by only a small number of people with a specialized knowledge or interest] practice or religious ritualism is a colonial era European invention (according to Wikipedia).
So how did we get to what we understand to be “modern” Tantra?
Wikipedia tells us that “the occultist and businessman Pierre Bernard (1875–1955) is widely credited with introducing the philosophy and practices of tantra to the American people, at the same time creating a misleading impression of its connection to sex”.
Now, I’m going to digress for a moment.
But this is a good warranted digression, as our guy Pierre really seems to deserve a moment or two of our time and I think you’ll agree with me on this…
Oom the Magnificent
Pierre Bernard lived from 1875 to 1955 and was known as “The Great Oom”, “The Omnipotent Oom” and “Oom the Magnificent”. He was a pioneering American yogi, scholar, occultist, philosopher, mystic and businessman.
He is reported to have been born Perry Baker or Peter Coon in Iowa, USA, 31 October 1875, the son of a barber.
Apparently he had a recognised practice of keeping his origins obscure…
Pierre (or Perry, or Peter, or Oom) was trained in Tantric yoga by a yogi he met in Nebraska.
The yogi taught Bernard body-control techniques of hatha yoga and he was able to put himself under such deep trance that he could be pierced with long surgical needles, of which he gave public demonstrations. Bernard also took interest in hypnotism.
In 1905, he founded the Bacchante Academy with Mortimer K. Hargis to teach hypnotism and sexual practices, which seems to have quickly died out.
Around 1905/1906 Bernard “claimed” to have travelled to Kashmir and Bengal before founding the “Tantrik Order of America”, under which, 12 years later, he was “gifted” a 72 acre estate with a thirty-room mansion in New York, from “a disciple” in 1918.
The mind boggles…
Ever the shrewd businessman (he eventually evolved to more conventional businesses, including baseball stadiums, dog tracks, an airport, and became president of the State Bank of Pearl River in 1931) he eventually expanded to a chain of tantric clinics in places such as Cleveland, Philadelphia, Chicago, and New York City.
Bernard is widely credited with being the first American to introduce the philosophy and practices of yoga and tantra to the American people (thank you Wikipedia).
He also played a critical role in establishing a greatly exaggerated association of tantra with the use of sex for mystical purposes in the American mindset.
So you’re off the hook Sting, at least according to Wikipedia. [One wonders just how much Sting donated to get the Pierre Bernard Wikipedia page up…]
Not to leave out the historical contribution of the ladies…
The Omnipotent Oom married Blanche de Vries, who herself contributing to a shift in attitudes about women’s autonomy and sexuality. She taught yoga combining yoga with Eastern-inspired sensual dance and continued teaching in New York into her eighties.
Pierre Bernard died on 27 September 1955, aged 79 in New York City.
What a life he led….
Back to Tantra…
So basically what might be assumed as “Tantra” in modern day Western popular culture could really just be considered a kind of sex-hyped bastardisation of a bunch of loosely tied and probably misunderstood mix of eastern philosophies.
But what is it really?
I really don’t know what it is. Maybe someone can offer a distinct explanation.
What I do know is that scholastically/academically speaking there does not exist agreement on what it is.
What I can share is what I have learned in my sparse and limited experience.
Tantra – life simplified to its essence
Simplified to its essence life could be defined by 2 simple words: yes and no.
At any one time I could ask myself the question of whether I am in a state of “yes” or “no” with what is happening here, right now, in this moment.
Am I in a state of “yes” with what is happening in my life, or a “no”? And in my relationships – how I am relating to the person(s) I am here with?
Knowing this requires a recognition that sometimes a “no” is actually a yes to yourself, meaning, the state is about what is going on internally for oneself, whether I am tuned in and listening to myself, and whether I am saying “yes” to what is true for me in this moment and that could be to give an external “no”.
When I am in a state of “flow”, I am in a yes, and it feels good. My body is relaxed and I feel well. When I am in a “no”, I find tension in my body, resistance. I don’t have to like what is happening in my life, or necessarily enjoy it – life brings many things which are not easy or enjoyable necessarily (death, illness, sadness) – but to resist any of these things rather than to accept that they are happening will inevitably to suffering.
Intimacy with the Self
In order for me to know whether I am in a yes or a no, I must be able to tune into my core self, and stay in tune with it. Because often we can *think* we know how we feel something, but it is our defence mechanisms and cognitive biases that are misleading us.
So for me, a big part of Tantra is intimacy with the Self.
Enabling true intimacy with others
If I cannot be intimate, or aware of what is true for me in that moment, I cannot be honest, or truthful with other people. So to relate honestly with other people requires that I can tune in to a very core, very deep level, truth about what is going on for me in that moment.
Am I scared, embarrassed, ashamed, wanting, needy, delighting, excited in that moment I am sharing with you?
Could I be hiding from myself?
How does this relate to anxiety or fear or frustration or suffering?
When I am in a state of great internal “no”, I am suffering. Sometimes my yes and no signals get jumbled up, so that part of me wants to do something, or feels I “should” being doing something, but another part doesn’t want to do that, or feels something else is more important. And I end up with a sense of inner conflict. A sort of “there’s something wrong”, and I get scared of that feeling, and I feel fear.
And then, I can feel afraid, because it feels scary to not know what I am afraid of, what I might be missing…
So for me, tuning in and being able to sense what is the real yes and no for me can be very helpful. Sometimes, when I am not able to tune in, just knowing that there is this internal conflict can be very helpful. To be able to just be with it for the now. In this moment. Moment, to moment. And then another, and another. Eventually coming into presence. And calm.
And sometimes it is that I am in a state of no to my inner busyness. When my head’s loaded multiple different trains of through and it’s spinning around. And my yes is to listen to that no, and create a yes for myself, by taking a few minutes to sit and breathe and even when I think it’s not working, to continue the stillness and I no longer feeling a disconnect with this moment, so I am back in presence.
Intimacy with this Life
So intimacy with myself, is a kind of intimacy and presence with this life. It is a kind of consenting to myself and all that I am experiencing.
As a woman, the biggest shift in my sparse and limited experience has been the shift in focus from pleasing others, to tuning into myself.
Learning what “turns me on” in life
If I can be present with myself I can learn what brings me joy, what puts me in a state of flow.
In that way, tantra has helped me learn what “turns me on” in life. And that is Magnificent.